✦ Martina Million

A name and surname I chose — because I decided I would become the person I want to be.

I was born in Poland under my mother's maiden name, with a middle name I never liked. Later, when my parents married, I took my dad’s surname — a shift that brought new energies into my identity. Despite being engaged three times, I never got married, so I took fate into my own hands. From Martyna Magdalena Kinel, I fully shifted — in every way — into Martina Million.

I had no idea that this name would challenge me like nothing else ever had. But it makes sense now.
A million awakenings.
A million ideas.
A million changes.
A million realities.

I’ve always felt like I was a lot. I am a lot even more now. Born sensitive and psychic in a Catholic world full of fear and demons, I blocked my gifts after seeing my first entity at 3.5 years old. Thirty years later, I faced the same being again — this time fully awake, after years of terror and pushing myself to the edge.

Nothing in my life was gentle. Not my childhood. Not my love life. Not my financial reality.

And I’m glad for that. I was a rough diamond. I had to shape and polish myself — for myself. Now, I cut through illusions. I shine bright. And I am unbreakable.

You name the trauma — I’ve probably lived it. Only natural disasters passed me by, although honestly, living in Scotland for half my life and dealing with all that rain was a disaster. I'm not even kidding :)

Born Polish, I inherited a full ancestral package of trauma and suppression — but I was also born with a spirit that fights for freedom. Poles have Phoenix energy. We can rebuild from ashes as many times as we need. And that’s exactly what I’ve done.

I became a serial killer of my own identities:
The people-pleaser.
The good girl.
The one trying to fit in.
The one trying to shrink, because I was always "too much."

The suppression, the emotional overload, the belief that I had to carry everything alone and for everyone — it led to a suicide attempt. That was the first time my soul crushed my ego and said:

“You’re not running away. We’re not done here.”

And instead of a happy ending, a few months later, I experienced another heartbreak and a miscarriage. I buried it. Denied it. I couldn’t handle it until I was ready — and when I was, it triggered a war with demons, mostly ancestral.

Long story short (I could write a whole saga, honestly), I spent years healing my family line through myself. It felt like drowning in shit most of the time. Everyone loves to romanticize the curse-breaker or the pattern-breaker, but the truth is: it takes balls of steel.
We do get that from our ancestors — but you have to earn it. You have to unpack it.

So here I am. The Star of my lineage. The Protector, the Liberator, the whatever-else-I’ve-been-called. Honestly, I’m proud of myself. Because at the end of the day, I’m just me. Marti. Simple as that. I don’t care about titles. I am everything I want to be. A treasure that knows its worth — and how to protect it.

✦ Subconscious Alchemy

This is my gift to anyone ready to face their patterns and change them.

I’m not here to save anyone — fuck that. You can do it yourself. And that’s exactly how it should be.

Own your power.
Own your problems.
Own your weaknesses.
Own your reality — so you can shape it as you wish.

I’m salt in your wounds — because they need disinfecting before you get the balm and the bandage. But if you’re ready — I’ll walk beside you. No fluff. No sugar. No fake saviour stories.

I’m not a healer. I don’t use titles. I’m not your mother. I’m not your guru. I’m not even your guide. I’m someone real — ready to walk with you through your shadows, and witness you as you kill every fake, imposed personality you’ve ever worn. Until you can finally say:
“This is me.”